” Children are a blessing from the Universe. These bright spirits have come to give us love and light. Children are old spiritual souls coming to have another human experience and have chosen you, their parents, for the lessons and challenges they’ll be given. Our children are here to teach us the meaning of things if you’re ready to learn from them” Louise Hay
This is the opening paragraph of a newsletter that I received from the amazing Louise Hay this morning. I looked to see if she had written a blog on a similar subject that I could recommend to you. Since I couldn’t find anything I decided to base this blog on Louise’s thoughts.
Now you may not believe in reincarnation but I would like to state here, for reasons of authenticity, that I do. In fact for me it makes a whole lot of sense. As a little girl I used to think that if everyone who had ever died had gone to heaven then heaven must be very crowded!!! When I first came across the idea of reincarnation, the thought that we choose to live more than one life in a human body so that we have different experiences, well that resonated with me. It seemed to make sense. But whether you believe or not there are 2 interesting thoughts that arise from Louise Hays words.
Why would your children choose you?
Firstly if your children did have a choice and chose you to be their Parent, why would they choose you? What qualities would they want to learn from you? Are you loving and kind? Are you assertive and good at setting boundaries? Do you treat everyone you meet with respect? Are you non judgemental? Are you passionate about something? Do you take care of yourself? Are you successful financially? Are you happy? What positive reasons would they have for choosing you?
And also what challenges would they have as a result of being your child? No one is perfect and who ever we live with, sooner or later, there will be challenges. As you have probably already found out living with the children you love and adore is not always easy! Do you set high standards? Are you obsessive about certain things? How do you show up in your relationship with your child’s father? Are you opinionated and critical of others? Are you hard on your self? Does your work take up a lot of your time? Are you stressed and short tempered? Do you think life is unfair and your kids had just better get used to it?
It is an interesting exercise to think about why your children would choose you. Good and bad, what do you bring to their lives? It is also an interesting thought to realise that if your children chose you they already knew about your shadow side, the things that you do or say that make their life difficult. Although I love my Dad dearly he has never really been there for me. When my Mum died I think a part of him died too. Eventually he married my Step Mum and quite frankly she wanted my Dad but not me and my sister. I left home at 16 and my Dad would only give me the £3.50 child allowance that he got in my name. I am not telling you this to feel sorry for me. I am sharing this with you because I learned some valuable lessons from him.
What I learned from my Dad
I learned to stand on my own 2 feet, to rely on me.
I learned that I didn’t have to go through life feeling alone and unsupported. There are always people around us who want to help but we have to invite them in. We have to say Yes when they offer to help. And also I believe that I am never alone because I have my Guardian Angels with me every moment of every day.
I learned the importance of family. By not having a family around me I experienced what was missing.
I learned that I have to accept people as they are. I love my Dad but he never was the Dad I wanted hm to be. It is always difficult to find a card for him on Fathers Day. He isn’t the best Dad in the world, he wasn’t Dads taxi or the Bank of Dad. The only card that fits is Thinking of you on Fathers Day and they are not always easy to find. Do I love my Dad? Yes with all my heart. Do I like the choices he made? No but I have to accept he did the best he could at the time. Do I understand why I may have chosen him? Yes I would not be the person I am today or do the work I now do if I had not had the childhood that I did.
So my challenge to you is to take a moment to focus on Why your children would chose. And then, remembering that you are their role model, take another moment to decide if there is anything you would like to change or do differently.
I did say that 2 interesting thoughts came to mind from the opening paragraph of Louise Hays newsletter. The second is What are our children here to teach us? but I will take a look at that question in my next blog. As always please do share your thoughts on my blog or any thoughts that you may have as a result of asking yourself Why did my child choose me?